Love's labour lost

‘Love’, that magical word we all pretend to have an understanding of, has definitions so varied that one would almost think that such a concept did not exist. The love I’m talking about today is the love we talk about in reference to our better halves. I’m not pondering on the forms and types of love but rather just an understanding of its basic nature. When can we say we are in love? Is it the surge of excitement and happiness on encountering the object of our affection somewhere unexpectedly or is it the silent admiration and respect held for someone, currently, far from one’s reach or is it the mental acknowledgement of somebody’s importance in one’s life? When we don’t really know the true definition of love, can we really afford to wait for the ‘right one’ to come along? A character from the book 'Pride and Prejudice' comes to mind. Mr. Collins is this loser kind of guy who proposes to Elizabeth Bennet simply because there are a list of reasons (none of them being love) why he thinks its ‘appropriate’ for him to get married at that particular time. Lizzie, of course refuses but then some days later, her best friend Catherine comes over to tell her that she’s engaged to Mr. Collins. At Lizzie's shocked expression, Catherine tells her that this is the best offer she thinks she’s ever going to get considering that she’s 27 yrs old and has poor prospects because of her humble background. At the look of outrage on her friend's face, Catherine “dares” her to judge her for she thinks that not everyone can afford to be romantic in life and sometimes, life forces you to make a compromise.

We usually tend to label characters like these as “weak” and "spineless" but I think we ourselves are in error here. I think it takes more courage to compromise than to be stubborn sometimes. I think it takes a greater effort to resign oneself to mediocrity when something far better and desirable has even a remote possibility of happening in the future. So, what of those who believe in the whole funda of “love” being the most important thing in life? Can these people wait all their lives for the “love of their life” to come by? It it worth the wait at the end? I know a novice like me has no experience and authority on such maters but still it des give me lots of food for thought. I think its all a game of probability, the probability of just about anybody being in your life at the right moment and in the right situation. That’s what love is, that “anybody” being immaterial.

That’s where logical analysis of the whole concept takes you but then I’ve always prided myself on being a die-hard romantic and a streak of irrationality is an inevitable side-effect of being a romantic. I believe in true love, in the existence of a soulmate and the works. I believe in the power of love to heal wounds inflicted by time and circumstances. Love's the only thing that keeps you anchored during storms in life. It’s the only thing worth living for, for all emotions, be it happiness or sadness are inevitably linked to it. It adds colour to an otherwise colourless world. It gives flowers, their sweet smell and spring, its freshness and birds, their gaiety. To be able to feel, one should be able to love. Its something each one of us is innately capable of doing, so we really don’t need to go about trying to define the whole concept and reaching a consensus about it. It can mean different things for different people. For some, it can be the whiff of her perfume, for some, the way his hair falls on his forehead, for some the pure laughter of a happy child, for some the concern in an elder’s eye. As long as we acknowledge its prescence in our lives, love’s alive. All we have got to do is stop trying to customize it. Rather, we should let it mould us!